Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Extraordinary from the Ordinary

It came from something as simple as printing forms. Seriously. Thing is, previously, I would not have even dreamt of printing them out--12 full-colored pages, plus some black and whites, some with a background, some without--26 pages all in all, give or take. I had previously been worrying from what Internet café I could print them, and how much they would cost, but yesterday, I don't know what possessed me to just take that leap, to hell with what happens, but to just do it.

I crossed my fingers, but at the same time was ready to print the rest at an Internet café in case the printer ran out of ink, as prior to printing, it had already been flashing the notice "Black Ink Low; Color Ink Low" (hence the dilemma). But wonder of wonders, all forms printed safely. As mundane as this sounds, it kinda told me not to fear but to step forward and take that leap. This is kinda reminiscent of what my friend N told me when I griped to her about failing: "So what if you fail? It's a part of life; you just pick yourself up and do something else." And indeed, my whole life is riddled with gripes on what-ifs; now to let go of that and fully commit in the present moment. Whatever fears I have, let them go. If I fail, I can always get back up again. I should remember this.

Speaking of my friend N, in one of our recent conversations, we talked about *the past*, and last Sunday, I saw this article. In relation to the gospel last Sunday, where the presiding priest exhorted us to let God speak through us, perhaps this is God's way of telling me to just drop *the past*. Like a hot potato.

If only it were that easyAmen.

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